Capítulo 02

Politeness & Register

The five words you'll say hundreds of times, and the tú/usted choice behind every sentence.

You will not be tested on greetings at the consulate. You will be judged on whether you sound polite. In Mexican Spanish, politeness is built from five lubricant words used in every interaction, and a single ongoing choice — tú vs usted — that shapes every verb you speak.

This chapter is short on purpose. Memorize what’s here and you sound respectful from sentence one, even if everything else is broken.

The politeness backbone

These five words do more work than anything else you’ll learn. Say them reflexively, every time:

: Please
: Thank you
: Thank you very much
: You’re welcome (the response to gracias)
: Excuse me (to get someone’s attention or apologize)
: Sorry / pardon me (lighter than disculpe)
: With permission — said when passing someone or leaving a room

On con permiso: this one surprises English speakers. Say it when you squeeze past someone in a narrow aisle, when you step away from a table, when you enter or leave an office. The expected response is or — “of course, go ahead.” Not saying con permiso when you should comes across as rude, even if nothing else is wrong.

Hello and goodbye

: Hello — works any time of day
: Good morning (until ~noon)
: Good afternoon (noon until sunset)
: Good evening / good night
: Casual shortcut covering afternoon + evening

: Goodbye
: See you later — the default everyday parting
: See you tomorrow
: Have a good day (formal — shopkeepers and officers say this to you)

Tú vs. usted — the choice behind every sentence

Spanish has two words for “you.” This is not a politeness nicety you can skip — you pick one with every sentence, and the verb changes along with it.

: informal — for friends, kids, peers you know
: formal — for strangers, elders, officials

The rule for your trip: default to usted. At the consulate, at INM, with taxi drivers, at hotel reception, at the pharmacy counter, with anyone older than you — always usted. Switch to tú only if the person uses it with you first, or with young children.

Picking the wrong one has real consequences: using tú with an INM officer sounds disrespectful. Using usted with a friend of a friend sounds cold. The safe direction of error is formal.

Verb shape changes

Same question, two shapes:

: How are you? (tú)
: How are you? (usted)

: What’s your name? (tú)
: What’s your name? (usted)

: Do you have an appointment? (tú)
: Do you have an appointment? (usted)

Notice the pattern: tú ends in -s (estás, tienes, llamas). Usted drops that -s (está, tiene, llama). If you remember only one thing from this chapter: the usted form sounds like the he/she form, without the final -s.

Responding to “how are you”

: Very well, thank you. And you? (formal)
: Good, thank you
: All good
: So-so

Don’t over-engineer this. “Bien, gracias” is always safe and always enough.

The one Mexican word you’ll actually use: `¿Mande?`

In most of Latin America, ¿Qué? is how you say “what?” when you didn’t hear something. In Mexico, ¿qué? alone sounds blunt. The polite alternative is — literally “command me?” — and you will hear it constantly, especially from older people and service staff.

: Pardon? / Could you repeat?

Use this whenever you miss something an INM officer, shopkeeper, or taxi driver said. Treat it as the polite reset button.

(You may also hear — but don’t need to use — ¿qué onda? “what’s up”, órale “whoa/okay”, ándale “go on”. Recognize them, skip them. They’re for bars, not government offices.)

Putting it together: two micro-exchanges

At the INM reception (formal, uses usted throughout):

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Leaving a small café (brief but polite):